Separation of a family is always a complicated affair, but when the husband has three different wives leaving him, things get compounded quickly. For me, given Kody Brown‘s behavior over the years on the TLC series Sister Wives, it isn’t surprising that any of his wives would consider leaving him. His negligence towards his original three wives after Kody married his fourth wife, Robyn Brown, and his distance from his other children after his new wife came into the picture, was enough to give me pause. I believe if you want to know the truth about a man, watch how he treats his ex-wife. Or in this case, ex-wives.
Meri Brown, Janelle Brown, and Christine Brown have been subjected to a slew of misrepresentations, lies, and revisionist histories since ending their respective relationships with Kody. While all three of his ex-wives place the blame on him for the family falling apart, Kody blamed his ex-wives for the break-up of the family because they suddenly would not submit to his authority once he used the COVID pandemic as an excuse to abandon his household duties owed to them and their children. Now, Kody has been working overtime in Season 19 to try to save face and spin the narrative in his favor. It seems to me that Kody was treating his original three wives terribly as nothing more than an effort to force their hands so they would end the relationship first, and leave him free to play the baffled victim.
Has Robyn Become The Villain of the Story?
Among Kody’s many wives, there is one left working hard to maintain the illusion that the Browns have a chance to become united family again. As the wife who joined the family most recently, Robyn was completely sold on the idea of plural marriage after a previous relationship ended in divorce. Robyn continues to idealize the pluralist lifestyle, and has been frequently accused by other family members of playing “victim” on the series when it comes to them not meeting expectations in this area. Robyn has become the villain in the series, because she enables Kody to be the absolute worst, while centering her own desires and anxieties in the family drama.
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The couple need to double down on their claims that the family troubles are because of Kody’s other wives’ change of heart, because they refuse to admit their lifestyle is the problem. It is clear to me that, regardless of how Kody justifies his behavior to himself, he wanted to live the life of a private married couple with Robyn, while still benefiting from the plural lifestyle. He continued to have his other wives raise his children in his absence, buy properties in their own names for “the family” to use, and pool their financial resources at Kody’s discretion.
Without Robyn standing by his side, and making claims on his behalf of feelings of regret and sadness about the family situation that are completely absent from any scenes he films, Kody’s claim to be the one being wronged would be drowned by everyone else in the family telling their side of the story. Women in patriarchal relationships have had to make excuses for the immaturity of their partners since forever, and so Robyn is filling a traditional role here by allowing Kody to hide behind her and their young family as an example of him still being a “good” man. Kody’s behavior towards his ex-wives speaks for itself, and despite whatever cognitive dissonance allows Robyn to continue to make excuses for him, it seems she is even becoming aware that standing by Kody means she too will become a villain herself.
Enabling Kody Makes Robyn a Villain Too
As much as Kody claims in the most recent episode that he has “never been a patriarch,” his demand that his ex-wives and children from a plural marriage begin respecting him as the head of the household and never disagree with him openly is exactly that. It’s clear to me that Kody is demanding that his family get in line, follow his rules, and respect his word as law, which are the benefits he feels entitled to because of the structures of patriarchy, whether he wants to acknowledge it or not.
By echoing her husband’s demand that the family return to their roles and adhere to Kody’s leadership, while only gently reprimanding him along the way for his temper and tone, she continues a long history of playing the victim while also siding with the source of the problem. Even though in recent episodes Robyn has started to stand up to Kody, she is the villain because she also plays the victim, despite knowing that doing so enables Kody to be even more villainous to his ex-wives than ever. He uses her as an excuse, and she excuses herself by stepping back and playing the submissive, supportive wife. If this keeps Robyn in the “right,” then the other Sister Wives are right for being wrong. For those looking to catch up on all the drama happening in this show’s latest season, Sister Wives airs Sunday at 10PM ET on TLC, and is readily available to stream on Max.
A reality TV series explores the life of a polygamous family as they navigate the challenges and complexities of living in a society that largely disapproves of their lifestyle. The family’s dynamic, including the relationships between the husband, his four wives, and their 18 children, offers a unique insight into this unconventional family structure.
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