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Credit: Janet Mayer/startraksphoto.com
Bethenny Frankel announced the death of her mother, Bernadette Birk, on Instagram on Saturday.
With a lengthy post about her troubled childhood and her complicated relationship with her mom, who she reconciled with after years of turmoil, the 53-year-old Real Housewives of New York City alum confirmed Bernadette recently passed away after a battle with lung cancer.
“My mother has died of lung cancer. She was complex, in pain, isolated and had demons. She was the most stunning woman you have ever seen, who left her abusive home as quickly as I ran from mine. I was born on her bday,” Bethenny began in the April 20 post.
“She was brilliant, funny, cultured and wise — yet suffered a lifelong eating disorder, alcoholism, abuse, smoking, and self destruction. Despite not being equipped to be a mother, she loved me and I have beautiful memories of her,” she continued. “She taught me food, wit, culture and strength. She loved to dance.”
Looking back at her younger years, Bethenny said she was forced to become an adult early on, before she was as old as her daughter, Bryn Casey Hoppy, 13, and noted that she went through things “no young child should endure.”
“This made me strong, tough, a survivor who is able to handle anything. The universe gave me the most beautiful daughter and my childhood gave me inspiration to break the chain,” she went on.
As for why she opted to reconcile with Bernadette prior to her passing, Bethenny said she wanted her mom to have a relationship with her daughter and added that they ultimately bonded over their love of art.
“She was selfish in life, yet selfless in death. She left what little she had to my daughter, wished to be cremated, and wanted no one to be notified besides me,” Bethenny shared.
Bethenny also shared that at the time her mom died, she was dancing to the song “I’m Alive” in a dress from her mother’s favorite designer, Alaia.
“I remember her as a young woman during periods of happiness loving me and long for those memories of affection. I mourn her loss, her life, her loneliness and my childhood. I mourn her inability to experience motherhood, the most beautiful gift of a lifetime,” Bethenny stated, adding, “Goodbye mom, Bonnie, Bernadette. You did the best you could and you are free and at peace.”
Her full message can be seen below.
Following the sharing of the news, Bethenny was met with heartfelt messages from a number of Bravolebrities, including Vicki Gunvalson, 62, Sai De Silva, 43, Guerdy Abraira, 46, and Ramona Singer, 67.
Kiki Barth, 34, Stephanie Hollman, 43, Kyle Richards, 55, Danielle Cabral, 38, and Kary Brittingham, 53, weighed in as well.
Also in the comments section of the post, Bethenny reacted to an Instagram user who wanted to know why she “couldn’t be with her [mother] when she was dying.”
“I didn’t know she was dying,” Bethenny replied. “The next am I got a phone call and knew. The irony was that I was dancing in her favorite designer but thanks for the judgement. It’s quite helpful now.”
Bethenny was featured on seasons one through three and seven through 11 of The Real Housewives of New York City and in three seasons of her spinoff, Bethenny Ever After.