I’m not gonna lie, I like watching Michael Bay motion pictures. The person makes huge occasion movies tailored for the massive display screen. Whereas he sometimes throws up an egg, even his worst movies characteristic one thing that warrants a glance or two.
That stated, I’ve gone forward and ranked Bay’s movies from worst to finest in your studying pleasure. Clearly, not everybody will agree. So, pontificate along with your record of Bay’s flicks within the feedback, however please bear in mind to maintain the dialogue civil, individuals.
Michael Bay Movies Ranked From Worst to Finest
Transformers: The Final Knight
As was lately revealed in an interview, Michael Bay admits he made far too many Transformers movies. That a lot was clear after the half-hearted Age of Extinction, however not less than that one had Dinobots. The Final Knight begins with a drunken Stanley Tucci (as Merlin, no much less) pleading with an historic robotic for assist — one thing about King Arthur, a employees, and a three-headed dragon that assaults by way of barrel roll for some motive — and solely goes down from there.
Right here we’ve a case of 1 too many concepts being blended in a bowl with largely unsatisfying outcomes. Mark Wahlberg grudgingly returns as “wisecracking” inventor Cade Yeager and appears positively depressing within the position, whereas Laura Haddock, Josh Duhamel, and even Anthony Hopkins pop in to ship flaccid exposition designed to maneuver the “plot” to the subsequent huge set-piece.
That stated, the motion in The Final Knight, notably within the remaining act, is sort of spectacular, and Steve Jablonsky’s magnificent rating is appropriately epic. Additionally, regardless of his total lack of characterization (and full disregard for snappy one-liners), Optimus Prime continues to be fairly damned superior.
Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen
Revenge of the Fallen is a type of terrible motion pictures that I nonetheless by some means get pleasure from. The plot doesn’t make a lick of sense; and almost each determination made — from Sam Witwicky’s transformation from plucky underdog to raging douche, the Spongebob twins who appeared to offend everybody and a bloated finale that willingly introduces the idea of robotic angels — feels just like the flawed one.
But, when it comes to enjoyable theater experiences, Revenge of the Fallen ranks excessive on the record. I noticed the flick a handful of occasions with a packed home and everybody appeared to have a very good time. There’s loads to admire right here, together with that wild intro through which Optimus takes down a large wheel thingy, and a forest battle the place our noble metallic hero takes one for the crew. Additionally, regardless of Sam’s horrible characterization, Shia LaBeouf delivers an admirably bats— loopy efficiency that by some means matches completely amongst the madness, whereas Megan Fox is, properly, Megan Fox.
No, this isn’t some ignored gem that has aged gracefully over time — in actual fact, it’s worse than I bear in mind — however credit score have to be given to Bay for having the balls to throw this heaping piece of scrap steel onto the massive display screen, notably because the comply with as much as considered one of his finest movies. You possibly can see the person struggling to make sense of his personal chaos, which, greater than any of his movies, feels extra disjointed than standard — and that’s saying one thing.
Revenge of the Fallen might not be everybody’s cup of tea, however, man, does Bay go down with the ship in an astonishing blaze of glory.
Transformers: Age of Extinction
Following the diminishing returns of the primary three Transformers, Bay surprisingly hooked up himself to what was largely seen as a mushy franchise reboot. You’d assume the person would convey one thing new to the desk, however as an alternative, Age of Extinction largely lingers in overtly acquainted territory.
Swapping LeBeouf for Wahlberg felt like the suitable transfer on the time, however the actor doesn’t mesh properly with the suffocating CGI motion and is generally wasted in a thankless position. Additionally, at a bladder-blasting two hours and forty-five minutes, the would-be epic is way too lengthy and needlessly convoluted. Optimus Prime has little to do however impart the occasional little bit of knowledge, whereas his robotic brethren (exterior of the at all times dependable Bumblebee) have little to do however cater to stereotypes.
What’s stunning is how little any of our robotic heroes have modified over a decade of nonstop struggle. Evidently, Transformers don’t undergo from PTSD. On the plus facet, the finale set in Hong Kong is fairly damned spectacular, Stanley Tucci is hilarious, a number of the motion pops, and the pic’s robotic antagonist, Lockdown, makes for a menacing foe. Plus, Dinobots are cool.
Dangerous Boys
Dangerous Boys stays, maybe, Michael Bay’s solely true movie within the conventional sense. As in, it’s the lone image in his sprawling oeuvre that follows a three-act construction, strives for one thing resembling characterization, and focuses extra on plot (nevertheless convoluted) than whiz-bang motion.
It’s additionally the least Michael Bay movie on this record and the least bold of the lot, which knocks it down a couple of pegs in my ebook.
Yeah, Will Smith and Martin Lawrence are enjoyable of their respective roles, even when they’re largely enjoying the identical character — a lot in order that Téa Leoni can’t differentiate the 2 — in what quantities to a watered-down model of Deadly Weapon. Bay’s frenetic power manages to maneuver the plot from Level A to Level B with out a lot fuss, whereas Mark Mancina’s kick-ass rating drives the motion with aplomb.
Dangerous Boys is actually value a glance however is a tad overrated in my ebook and nowhere close to as enjoyable as its sequel.
6 Underground
Man, I actually needed to like 6 Underground. Michael Bay and Ryan Reynolds delivering a gonzo motion epic free from studio restrictions on Netflix? Signal me up. Sadly, the ultimate product fails to achieve the wonderful heights of Bay’s earlier work and revels in grotesque violence excess of it ought to.
This being a Bay product, the cinematography is attractive and a number of the motion — notably a set piece on a ship involving any variety of sharp objects and an enormous f—ing magnet — genuinely excites. Reynolds brings his standard deadpan humor to the proceedings and is flanked by the stunning Mélanie Laurent and a handful of enjoyable supporting gamers.
Sadly, as is the case with most Netflix productions, the scope is comparatively small when in comparison with Bay’s extra outlandish efforts. As such, the ultimate product is pleasurable, however nowhere close to as enjoyable or spectacular accurately.
Transformers: Darkish of the Moon
After the blended reactions to Revenge of the Fallen, Bay and firm pledged to exit with a bang within the third and “remaining” Transformers movie, Darkish of the Moon. Whereas, sure, the outcomes are undoubtedly extra centered and refined than the bloated sequel, Darkish of the Moon nonetheless options most of the similar issues which have plagued all of Bay’s robots in disguise — particularly, a normal lack of focus and logic.
Negativity apart, I nonetheless actually benefit from the pic for its trendy motion, Shia LeBeouf’s insane efficiency, and a few actually superior visible FX. The Chicago-based third act is wonderful to behold, whereas a sequence in a collapsing skyscraper is thrilling in and of itself. The pic lacks the center of the unique, however Bay’s motion is extra refined and simpler to comply with, and the comedy beats land a bit higher because of the likes of Alan Tudyk and John Turturro.
Plus, I missed Megan Fox. She has a sure attraction her substitute Rosie Huntington-Whiteley lacks.
Ache & Acquire
Right here’s the factor about Ache & Acquire: I noticed the darkish comedy in theaters when it was first launched, appreciated and even applauded it … however by no means had a need to observe it once more. Whereas I’m often sport for Bay’s extreme model, Ache & Acquire goes just a bit too far for my liking. Plus, the entire primarily based on a real story factor kinda freaked me out. I nonetheless respect Bay for making an attempt one thing new and for giving Dwayne Johnson his juiciest (and funniest) position thus far.
Even so, there’s an undercurrent of unhappiness in Ache & Acquire that’s laborious to shake. When Mark Wahlberg, who, together with Johnson and Anthony Mackie, makes an attempt to kidnap, torture and extort a rich man named Victor Kershaw, quietly explains, “I simply needed what everybody else had — no more, simply not the much less I used to be used to,” you genuinely really feel for the man regardless of his overt stupidity and full lack of humanity.
It isn’t Fargo, however I applaud the hassle.
The Island
There’s a lot to admire in The Island that it’s a disgrace the movie by no means fairly comes collectively in addition to it ought to. The primary half is actually intriguing as we comply with Ewan McGregor’s Lincoln and Scarlett Johansson’s Jordan of their day-to-day life in a futuristic society. Apparently, the skin world has fallen to destroy, leaving the survivors caught inside a high-tech facility the place they’re intently monitored and sometimes chosen (by way of a tv mannequin, no much less) to hitch the remnants of society on a mysterious island.
Because it seems, Lincoln and Jordan are literally clones of different individuals, bred as a way of harvesting organs and/or different physique elements ought to the unique topic want them. Justifiably, the pair escape and discover themselves being pursued by Sean Bean’s evil scientist and Djimon Hounsou’s violent crew of mercenaries. Chases, shootouts, and motion ensues, all of which look nice.
… besides, Bay unwisely abandons an intriguing idea in favor of generic set items. What might/ought to have been a Minority Report-styled thriller will get slowed down with the standard assortment of standoffs, fistfights, and explosions.
That’s to not say The Island isn’t good. In reality, it’s truly a variety of enjoyable because of stable performances from its leads and Bay’s knack for transferring issues alongside at a fast tempo. Although, I nonetheless assume this one might have discovered a spot alongside a number of the nice ones had Bay trusted his screenplay a bit extra.
Pearl Harbor
Yup, I did it. I ranked Pearl Harbor above eight different Michael Bay movies. No, I’m not sorry. I truly get pleasure from Pearl Harbor fairly a bit and at all times felt the movie was unfairly panned by critics when it was launched manner again in 2001. In his protection, Bay was primarily ordered to ship the subsequent Titanic; and the person does what he can with a reasonably rudimentary script that glosses over historical past in favor of hokey drama.
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Look, I get it. As a struggle movie, Pearl Harbor largely falls flat. Bay’s blockbuster sensibilities conflict with the horrific true-life parts whereas the love story is poorly rendered, regardless of a great-looking forged. And but, yearly I discover myself drawn to Bay’s epic drama in some unspecified time in the future, largely to get pleasure from that spectacular motion sequence … which nonetheless packs fairly the punch in any case these years.
Is that this cinema in its truest kind? Not an opportunity. Does Pearl Harbor appropriately honor those who fell on that dreadful December morning? Nope. Is Pearl Harbor one of many nice responsible pleasure movies of all time? Completely.
As one character says, “It’s bulls—. However it’s superb bulls—.”
13 Hours: The Secret Troopers Of Benghazi
Bay will get (largely) severe with this dramatic and action-packed retelling of the 2012 Benghazi assault that resulted within the loss of life of 4 Individuals working in Libya. Informed from the angle of the Annex Safety Group (comprised of former Navy SEALs, Marines, and Military Rangers) who tried to struggle off a violent militant group, 13 Hours options an abundance of heart-stopping motion and a stellar forged comprised of James Badge Dale and John Krasinski (leagues away from Jim Halpert), amongst others.
As was the case with Pearl Harbor, Bay’s model tends to overshadow the true-life parts inherent within the story. The movie sometimes feels extra like an prolonged Name of Obligation marketing campaign than an precise depiction of the horrific circumstances that occurred that fateful evening.
13 Hours actually works as an motion image with advantageous performances and sufficient heart-wrenching drama to carry our consideration, however by no means fairly ascends to the extent of, say, Ridley Scott’s Black Hawk Down. Even so, 13 Hours stays a stable entry in Bay’s huge physique of labor.
Dangerous Boys II
After Bay flopped with Pearl Harbor, which was criticized for its size, over-the-top model, foolish characters, unhealthy writing and overreliance on motion, his response was to make Dangerous Boys II — a movie that brings to the floor all of his finest and worst traits as a director. However in a great way.
Dangerous Boys II is pure trash and Bay is aware of it. Nay, he leans into it. Whether or not it’s ogling the breasts of a lifeless lady’s corpse or staging a wild chase via a Cuban favela — it’s okay as a result of the residents are apparently all drug producers — Bay pushes Bayhem to its extremes and delivers one of many craziest motion flicks ever produced.
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Severely, the prolonged automobile chase that happens early on is an astonishing little bit of motion filmmaking, whereas the insane climax through which Will Smith, Martin Lawrence, and a crew comprised of brokers from the DEA, TNT, CIA, and Coast Guard blast the holy s— out of a villain’s mansion is undeniably spectacular.
Positive, it’s largely an empty spectacle, however that doesn’t cease Bay from caking the manufacturing together with his oft-criticized model. If Pearl Harbor was Bay truly making an attempt, Dangerous Boys II is Bay not giving a rattling, and having an absolute blast doing what he does finest.
Armageddon
I’ve taken a variety of warmth through the years for brazenly admitting my fondness extra Armageddon, Michael Bay’s rock’em, sock’em doomsday image starring Bruce Willis, Ben Affleck, Liv Tyler, and a scene-stealing Steve Buscemi, amongst others. Look, I get it. From a essential perspective, Armageddon is each bit the shlocky mess critics dubbed it to be again in 1998. It’s overlong, overproduced, overedited, poorly acted, loud and exhausting.
But, when it comes to “flip your mind off on the door” blockbusters, Armageddon ranks among the many finest. The FX are spectacular, many of the motion dazzles and the overt patriotism is contagious, notably when considered on a July 4 weekend. I’ll by no means label Armageddon as an incredible movie, however I can’t lie about my emotions on the matter, both — as motion flicks go, this film is an absolute blast!
Ambulance
I have to let the hype down a bit earlier than I actually sit down and determine the place to put Bay’s newest characteristic, Ambulance. After my first viewing, my thought was: that’s in all probability the person’s finest movie … And but, that appears like hyperbole, so I’m going to again off and place it within the third spot in between Armageddon and Transformers. For now.
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This film was enjoyable! The motion dazzles, the camerawork (together with all that wild drone footage) pops and the performances by Jake Gyllenhaal and Yahya Abdul-Mateen II are terrific, with the previous clearly relishing the chance to go completely bonkers for two-plus hours. That stated, that is very a lot Eiza González’s movie. The actress dives into her position as ambulance EMT employee Cam Thompson with aplomb and enjoys essentially the most satisfying character arc of the image.
Bay’s frenetic model will get a bit exhausting in the direction of the tip, and a number of the motion sequences are laborious to comply with because of the fast slicing and largely handheld images. Maybe that was the purpose. Bay locations us in the course of this thrilling story and dares us to not maintain on for expensive life.
Ambulance is the kind of manic enjoyable that’s finest on the massive display screen.
Transformers
After unleashing Bayhem on the world with Dangerous Boys II and faceplanting on the field workplace with The Island, Bay regrouped and delivered considered one of his finest flicks with 2007’s Transformers. The motion extravaganza actually carries most of the director’s patented emblems, i.e. numerous explosions, heaps of obnoxious characters, in-your-face army propaganda, and an overabundance of product placement. And but, right here, that model meshes completely with the fabric.
It helps that government producer Steve Spielberg infuses the movie together with his trademark sense of coronary heart and marvel (one thing sorely missing from the 4 sequels that adopted) by way of Sam Witwicky’s relationship together with his new car-cum-robot pal Bumblebee. Throw in an enthralling Megan Fox, a stunning array of VFX, Steve Jablonsky’s triumphant rating, and a jaw-dropping finale and you’ve got your self a completely thrilling little bit of popcorn leisure.
The Rock
Cinemas have been saturated by quite a few Die Arduous wannabes through the years, however none had been fairly as efficient as Michael Bay’s The Rock. Stars Sean Connery and Nicolas Cage deserve a majority of the reward for his or her pitch-perfect chemistry — the aged warrior matched with the “chemical superfreak” — however its Bay’s course that actually lends taste to an in any other case routine script. In solely his second big-screen gig, the person demonstrates a knack for testosterone-fueled motion and wry humor — all of which might be grossly exaggerated in later movies however serves a better function right here.
As such, The Rock strikes from set piece to set piece with fluidity and elegance and entertains in a manner few movies can. Endlessly rewatchable and filled with pleasure, that is one helluva piece of leisure — and, for me, the proper Michael Bay blockbuster.
